| The Friendship Report
The Devil's Beatitudes |
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If the devil was to write his beatitudes, they would
probably go something like this: 1. Blessed are those who are too tired, too busy, too
distracted to spend an hour once a week with their fellow Christians -- they
are my best workers. 2. Blessed are those Christians who wait to be asked and
expect to be thanked -- I can use them. 3. Blessed are the touchy who stop going to church --
they are my missionaries. 4. Blessed are the troublemakers -- they shall be called
my children. 5. Blessed are the complainers -- I'm all ears to them. 6. Blessed are those who are bored with the minister's
mannerisms and mistakes -- for they get nothing out of his sermons. 7. Blessed is the church member who expects to be
invited to his own church for he is a part of the problem instead of the
solution. 8. Blessed are those who gossip -- for they shall cause
strife and division that pleases me. 9. Blessed are those who are easily offended -- for they
will soon get angry and quit. 10. Blessed are those who do not give their offering to
carry on God's work for they are my helpers. 11. Blessed is he who professes to love God but hates
his brother and sister -- for he shall be with me forever! 12. Blessed are you who, when you read this think it is
about other people. |
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